I can’t remember where I heard it, or who said it, but somehow a certain phrase stuck in my mind and has been so useful in helping guide me through life’s little challenges. When it comes to things like worrying, stress or even overwhelm, things can be quickly put into perspective by asking oneself, “Is this a big problem or a little problem?”
I’ll provide 2 examples. At the age of 40 with no warning, I felt something was going wrong in my body. It was during the night of a good friend’s 40th birthday. We were all going to head back to his house from a brewery, but I didn’t feel well and I knew it had nothing to do with having a few drinks that night. I had to make a choice to call 911 to prevent something bad from happening to myself. It changed the course of the night, but it was a concern worth worrying about in the moment and ultimately it saved my life. It was a big problem. Luckily I solved the big problem just in time and everything turned on okay.
In my second example, I’ll write about a little problem that in the moment felt so stressful. We signed my twins up for baseball, and for certain reasons we’ve missed some practices and shown up late when we should have been on time. The coach is not happy, and I personally understand how and why he feels this way. This last Sunday there was an early game. We woke up late and it was all out chaos trying to get the kids up, out of bed, fed, clothed and ready with their baseball gear (bats, helmets, mitts, etc.) We were moving fast, and our rushing was paying off. It actually looked like we weren’t going to be as late as I thought. I threw the kids in the car and started driving, when my son, who is a lot taller than his twin sister, says to me, “We have a problem! I think I’m wearing my sister’s baseball pants”. I quickly turn around while driving and see that his pants are about up to his knees, while hers look like bell-bottoms (slight exaggeration). In the moment, to me, it felt like a big problem We pulled over quickly and they swapped pants, which made us officially too late. It was the perfect time to ask myself that question. Is this a big problem or a little problem? It was a little problem.
I think most parents with young kids would agree, that this question could be asked about a hundred times a day. Try it out. Stressing out and fighting over these little things doesn’t usually help much. However, at minimum, this tool can help quickly put things into perspective.